KHATIYA PE MUHABBAT

KHATIYA PE MUHABBAT
Bold & Brooding!

After watching a series of awful movies in past seven days, I thought of writing my own. My readers, enjoy the story and leave your feedback :D

Writer, Director, Producer: Sane Insane
Technology: Webcam, Mobile Cam, Handy Cam
Language: Bhojpuri, will be dubbed in Tamil
Location: Saket

Scene 1: This story is of a girl called Sambhavna, with a zest for life, sharp features , dusky, growing up in a major north Indian cosmopolitan, and learning to endure, the quality of urban life it offers- fair price shops with adulterated sugar, social clubs with 30-year membership waiting lists, beauty parlours serving as brothels, airports with a choice of pre-paid taxi, three wheeler, bus services, and a variety of fairs at Pragati Maidan for Sunday family entertainment.

Scene 2: While at the Swami Ramdev College (Formerly St. Stephen’s College) – she meets and marries her classmate Rahul, a large Haryanavi who had strayed on to the campus when no one was looking, and managed to stay long enough to complete his degree in economics.

Scene 3: After wedding, Rahul flies off to New York to become a Wall Street pimp. Sambhavna is now in the loving care of her in-laws. Life and the living standard in the house, despite low income, are good. Her MIL is pious and very religious and serves her vegetarian delicacies. Sambhavna loves the spice range she uses, even though there is a distinct smell of dettol in potatoes and Baygon in baingan bharta. In return of this caring gesture, Sambhavna massages her MIL’s feet with ‘Tiger brand mustard oil’ in the nights, and occasionally take her to the nearby Spencer’s for grocery shopping on her brand new scooty that she has got on an easy payment three year plan.

Scene 4: For Sambhavna it is like being back at college again. She learns about self-respect and dignity. She encounters difficult concepts of human degradation and selfishness, learning the difference between humility and humiliation, depravity and deprivation.

Scene 5: It is new life for Sambhavna, but she spends her spare time in the company of Raja, her BIL, who lives, unfortunately in London. But that hardly matters. Having never met, the two develop an extraordinary affection for each other and Raja begins to call Sambhavna “Meri Silly”.

Scene 6: With the EU connection firmly established, the scene moves to France. Under the shadow of the Eiffel Tower, 50 exotic dancers from Africa and Australia gyrate to a melancholic song suggestive of the estranged relationship between Sambhavna and Raja; they shake their bodies in grief near Niagara Falls, then swing their sad butts against the backdrop of the Brisbane’s Treasury Casino. The song has enough pathos to say that Raja is the man for Sambhavna, not Rahul, the egocentric stocks inclined New Yorker.

Scene 7: Raja misses Sambhavna terribly, and continues to roam the streets of London in a vacuous delirium shouting Meri Silly! Meri Silly! With little to do, he strolls into a theatre, to see Secretary, the movie. Caught up in the delirium of betrayal and despotism, fear and love, he emerges teary eyed from the movie hall only to realize that there is still little to do. So he goes back into the theatre and watches the movie again. And again. And again. Till after the eleventh time, the theatre manager offers him a job of the usher. Accepting the job offer with innate humbleness, he asks the manager for extra allowances and leave on second Saturdays and Diwali. He heads down to the nearest watering hole, but with the image of Sambhavna permanently marked on his retina, he thinks only of his Silly.

Scene 8: One day, after watching American Pie for the thirtieth time, Raja is walking about the London Bridge singing old songs of Cliff Richards, when he hears an anguished sound from behind. Cliff Richards, who also happens to be roaming London streets looking for work, remembers the familiar melodies, but is offended by the awful singing of Raja. The sensitive Raja is offended by Cliff’s corrections and he falls sick. In the Indian Hospital for Registered Aliens in London, Raja lies on a Khatiya, thinking only of his distant love. As his condition deteriorates, a visiting astrologer suggests, the re-establishment of the lost love, as long as his payment is in dollars. News is conveyed by e-mail to India. The MIL, broken-hearted by the betrayal, is faced with the ultimate dilemma of the human condition – should she keep the news from Sambhavna, and let her delinquent son die at the hands of a foreign power that still detonates nuclear bombs? Or should she allow her DIL to go to London, so that Raja her adopted son, may live.

Scene 9: MIL heads off to the City Select Shopping Mall in the neighbourhood. The film will end here on this note.

Wanted: Song writers, singers, technicians with their own cameras, graphic designers & animators for foreign locations, new faces looking for a break, film distributors